Yesterday was a joyful day as we celebrated the moment, a friendship reunion and new beginnings.
We feel blessed and thankful for all the wonderful people we’ve met along our way through life. We are thankful for those who are no longer in our life and for the life lessons it’s thought us. We are most thankful to those who are still a part of our lives and whose presence (near or far) makes a difference.
Neri and Joan.
Today, I finally met Neri and her loving Family. We are all a DeVry Institute of Technology/University couples. She was Eduardo’s classmate and we used to chat a lot once upon a time, when we weren’t as busy with life and before we got married and started our families. She always had good advice to give and we stayed connected through Myspace and Facebook. After ten long years of wanting and hoping, I finally met Neri, which it seems, I have always known in my head and heart. She is a beautiful, strong and amazing Woman. A compassionate being, a free Spirit and her joy radiates. Have you ever had that feeling of meeting someone for the first time and had the impression of knowing them all your life? That’s how I felt in the presence of Neri.
Victoria Secret Gift Bag.
Thank you so much, Neri, for your hospitality and for allowing us to share a moment of one of your family’s cherished tradition. Thank you for the delicious food (as well as the ‘Take Home’). Thank you for the laughter, the conversations, the pictures, the gifts, the friendship, etc.
We thank God for you and for your wonderful husband, Michael. We thank God for your lovely children (you are teaching them well). Thank you for your continued encouragements in my life as a Writer and thank you for your invaluable input.
I pray that the Almighty God bless you abundantly and keep you safe, always.
“Owe no one anything, except to love each other, for the one who loves another has fulfilled the law.” – Romans 13:8 (ESV)
LOVE
. What exactly is this four letters word? Could it be gratitude and compassion for every living thing? Is Love other than what we think we know it to be? Do I love you because you give me the ultimate high or do I love you because you are a necessary piece in the Universe? Do I love you because you were molded by the same God who shaped me, advertently making us Brothers in Christ? Yes, I do. You might be a pain, but you are a necessary pain and I need you for my continued growth. We all need love, especially the type that elevates and brings out the best in us. Love is, and without a doubt, a beautiful thing.
When it comes to love, the heart seems present, but the mind is often not. Sometimes we fail even at the basic form of love (to listen, understand, to be open-minded, compassionate, etc). Love is a continuous struggle and we must be very cautious when dealing with difficult individuals. As a friend, I have failed to be patient a few times and I am conscious of my capacity to disappoint (taking too long to return phone calls, for instance as well as standing still in the midst of disrespect). As I am maturing, I’m also learning to be still (Psalm 46:10). I am not afraid to take the first step and ask for forgiveness regardless of the attitude of the other person.
Love is all I have to give; it’s all I seek and it’s all I need. I am not out to impress anyone, I use my words wisely.
Created by katie@kriselen.com.
FORGIVENESS
. Most people (including me, until last week) believe it’s a gift to oneself. Defining forgiveness this way is being selfish because we only think about us. Yes, our offender has done enough damage already, why should we include him/her in the big picture? Well, because our actions and decisions have consequences in the after life. Sometimes we believe that we have forgiven someone when in reality we have not. Take an accident for instance. You’re driving and you get hit badly. Because of the chock you don’t feel a thing at first and you do not see the need to seek medical attention. Then, within a few days or so, your body starts aching from places you never knew existed. Someone hurt you and you think, “Pfff, I don’t care!” and next thing you know, you’re all resentful. How do we go from forgetting/letting go to resentfulness? It takes a lot to forgive someone who has deeply hurt us and it can only be achieved through sincere prayers and love for our offender. If you can look at your offender in the eyes and all you feel is love, then, surely, you have forgiven him/her. If you hear someone talking about that person and all you feel is love, then you have let go of the hurt. There are degrees of offenses and hurts and forgiveness doesn’t happen overnight.
Fourteen years ago, after the death of my Sister, I was hurt. I understood that it was her time to go; however, I just couldn’t live past the fact that the individuals she needed the most consciously turned their backs on her. I was deeply hurt. My Sister and I were deeply connected so much that at times it felt like we were in each others mind. Though gone, the bond has not been broken. My Creator has blessed me with a unique gift which I’ve come to accept and embrace. Like many others, I am a Spiritual being who struggles with shortcomings.
To be shown how things went down and to be told not to hate, to be asked to promise not to retaliate; rather, to pray and love. That was painful to digest. Believing in the Word of God and believing it to be true has helped me tremendously in my quest for serenity. Having convinced myself that I had forgiven and slowly began experiencing bitterness; I was shown a list filled with wrongs that were done to my Sister and was asked again to pray and forgive. This time I had to go on my knees and ask God why? And how was I to forgive after learning about additional hurtful information? I was torn and deeply sadden. Then I stumbled upon the following Biblical passage: Again Jesus said, “Peace be with you! As the Father has sent me, I am sending you.” And with that he breathed on them and said, “Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive anyone’s sins, their sins are forgiven; if you do not forgive them, they are not forgiven.” – John 20:21-23 (NIV)
At this point, I was determined to pray and forgive. I thought about my own Sister and wondered if her personal sins were forgiven before she left the World of mortals? I hope so. I prayed for my sins, for hers and for that person who hurt her the most. Forgiveness is a painful yet rewarding process. It takes a lot to pray with love for someone who’s robbed you of everything. Once I was able to truly forgive, I felt so light and I received the Love of God. Now I feel joyful inside and out. I no longer refer to certain situations as lost causes because I see salvation and hope. I see new beginnings. You can never forget; you can only forgive and move on.
“Forgiveness is a selfless gift of love to others.” ― Joan Ambu
HUMILITY
. How many times have you heard the phrase ‘I pity you’, ‘you’re useless’, ‘you’re a wreck’, ‘you suck!’? Never? Once, twice, countless times? Those words are very hurtful and untrue.
If I am fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of God (Psalm 139:14), why then, do you pity me? Why do you think I’m useless? Have you walked in my shoes? Are you judging God? Are you having issues with His Creation? “Anyone who withholds kindness from a friend forsakes the fear of the Almighty.” – Job 6:14 (NIV). Don’t pity someone because you think you are better than them. We are not better than someone else. We might have what they don’t and chances are, they have what we don’t. We should pity ourselves for being self-centered (as it can be a sin in itself). In the eyes of our Creator we are all equals. If you truly respect yourself, you will refrain from labeling others.
We should strive to be compassionate beings and practice humility. Do not criticize others or brag of your accomplishments at every opportunity. Listen more, compliment more and help more. Give a little bit of your time to those in need. When you feel the urge to disrespect someone for whatever reason: resist through prayers by calling upon the One who never sleeps. Remember that, “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” – 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (NIV).
“If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.” – 1 Corinthians 13:1–3 (NIV)
“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” – Ephesians 4:29 (NIV)
I had my share of bullying growing up, one of which ended with a physical fight (and my bully never messed with me again). You see, I was a quiet one growing up and it made me an easy target for bullying. Anyways, a girl from my neighborhood regarded my slender body shape and silence as weaknesses because I refused to give into her constant attacks. One afternoon she decided to pick a fight while I was walking home. I kept calm and kept walking while she was insulting and pushing me. Just about two minutes away from home, some bystanders (who knew I was being bullied) made the situation worse by cheering. When that girl pushed me, again and again, I knew right there that the only way out was to fight back and win. That’s exactly what I did and she never bothered me again. I am in no way promoting violence; however, there comes a time in life when you are giving a choice: win (live) or loose (die). Which will you choose?
I have also been bullied because of my nose. I knew better because I was conscious about the size of my then disproportionate nose. I was coached about the temporary unevenness of growth during puberty and I was thought by my Sister to put and love myself first no matter what. She was my role model who constantly reminded me that I was beautiful inside and out. I believed and I refused to be defined by any part of my body.
For you the sufferers, I say, give silent words. Avoid the bullies if you can. If you can’t, always stay calm and never show them that you’re hurt (they will use it, if you do). Seek help, reach out to someone, speak up. In some extreme situations it’s best to have someone else fight your fight. Don’t stay down for too long as you might get comfortable and decide to adopt that position. Train yourself to memorize these powerful words: I am Worthy. You are a work in process yet to be perfected by the Almighty Father. You have the right to exist.
“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” – Psalm 139:14 (NIV)
The bottom line is that we are not what people think of us: we are what we believe to be. We become what we perceive ourselves to be. In a material world, some people seem to be better than others (I said ‘seem’ because certain things can’t be bought, which takes us back to the theory of appearances). You may not be better than someone, but no body is better than you and you have to believe it. Your oppressor is the one with issues, not you. Each time someone throws a hurtful word at you, you tell yourself: ‘self, I am not perfect, but I am worthy and I will not accept less.’ Sometimes your body language sends a false message, which a bully sees as weakness and decides to pick on you. Take a self-defense class to prepare you for those times when things really get out of hand and there’s no one to call for help. Change begins with you and you alone can decide when to start.
“You are a person. Words are labels.
Don’t ever accept to be labeled because labels are for things and you are not.” — Joan Ambu
If you witness someone being bullied, act. Be a good bystander and help out (defend the victim, find a way to discourage the bully or get an adult involved). Don’t be neutral because it could as well be you. Be more than just a bystander: reach out and stop it before it starts, if you can.
I know that some of us are not Believers and/or Christ followers. However, there is the Golden Rule which states that we should do unto others as we would have them do unto us. Watch your mouths and most importantly, watch your inner thoughts. How are you using your words today? Are you using them to build or to destroy?
“But I tell you that everyone will have to give account on the day of judgment for every empty word they have spoken. For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.” – Matthew 12:36-37 (NIV)
“Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” – Proverbs 22:6 (KJV)
Today I am sharing with you, the story of seven siblings (Kenedy, Emer, Jackie, Emmanuel, Patrick, Julius and Genevieve), who are, to the best of my knowledge, a wonderful example of Proverbs 22:6.
If you are like me then you will admit to be drawn to the beautiful faces and smiles of the individuals on the pictures. Yes, they are beautifully made in the image of our Creator. Yes, they are unique and they are my family. What you may know or not know about them is that they have lost both parents; their Father in 1992 and their Mother two years ago, on August 29th, 2010).
Aunt Sarah was a beautiful, gentle, soft-spoken and a woman of noble character; even when she tried to frown, it only accentuated her beauty. She was a Christian who never cheated life; who believed, followed the Words of God and gave thanks in all things. Being in her presence was comforting and when she smiled at you, all you could do was smile back. She was a biological mother to seven wonderful individuals and an adoptive mother to countless. She embraced everyone who crossed her path as her own. She didn’t just tell you how much she loved you; she made sure you felt it. She was a Mother, a Friend, a Comforter, a fervent server of the Lord and she lived a life that some of us can only dream of. She did an amazing job raising her children, who are a great examples of what Proverbs 22:6 is all about.
“To all who mourn in Israel, he will give a crown of beauty for ashes, a joyous blessing instead of mourning, festive praise instead of despair. In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks that the Lord has planted for his own glory.” – Isaiah 61:3 (NLT)
Kenedy, Emmanuel, Patrick & Julius.
Some might think that in losing their parents they had lost everything. It’s quite the opposite because in losing both parents, they gained new strength. I am not insinuating that they don’t care or that they don’t feel a thing. The pain is there. It is raw, perpetual and it will only ebb with time. I know because I have walked in their shoes.
When my Sister suddenly died in 1998, Jackie was the one by my side. She stood strong by me and showed me unconditional love. She became the other voice of reason; she helped mend the pieces of my shattered heart. She pretty much took over my shadow and kept me sane. Thank you, Jackie, for everything and for being such a loving and caring person.
This is the legacy aunt Sarah instilled in her children – devotion to God, respect for self and compassion toward others.
They were thought at a very young age to walk by faith and to live by hope. They were thought to be kind, especially to the unkind and hope that their love is strong enough to move them.
They are now stronger than ever. Love grows more love and it’s in giving that we receive (St. Francis of Assisi).
“See how very much our Father loves us, for he calls us his children, and that is what we are! But the people who belong to this world don’t recognize that we are God’s children because they don’t know him.” – 1 John 3:1 (NLT)
Emer, Jacqueline & Genevieve.
Whenever we forgive truly and love someone with the intend to elevate them, something miraculous happens and our lives are changed. We do not have to love people because they mean something to us; we have to love and respect them because they exist and because God teaches and commands us to love one another.
“Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies.” ― Mother Teresa
What are some of those small things, you ask:
» Children (Psalm 127:3).
Good things definitely come in small packages and aren’t those little ones full of surprises? They teach us new things every day.
From the moment my Son started asking about his deceased aunt, (my sister); I realized he was ready to learn about the circle of life. My children never go to sleep without praying. Sometimes, however, my son will, “Mommy, pray for us tonight because we are too tired. We will listen and say Amen after you.” His sister will quietly nod, “um-hmm.” Here’s the part of his prayer that always melts my heart, “… we pray for people we know and for those we do not know.” As I listen to him pray, I think of 1 Samuel 1:26-26.
Image Source: SearchQuotes.com.
» Relationships.
Togetherness is a powerful word. It represents love, unity, acceptance and much more. If you are fortunate to belong to a group of amazing people, sometimes, that alone suffices.
For all the things that go wrong in life, we have to remember that we are surrounded by good people who are willing to stand by us. I am particularly thankful to the friends I do not see as often in person, but wish I did.
» Walk – Meditate.
Take walks, admire and become one with Nature.
We obsess over the bigger picture that we completely forget about the wonders around us. We can only see such beauties by living the moment.
» Gardening.
Every gardener knows the joys that come from this activity. It sure requires time and patience to achieve ones goal. Not only does it allow us to get some time for ourselves; we also get creative (and eventually see results such as thriving plants). Gardening is a powerful stress reliever and we exercise in the process (yes, it can be quite a workout with all the digging, pulling, spreading).
» Remembrance (Philippians 1:3).
The power of positive remembrance is healing. Remembering positive experiences has the power to resuscitate feelings of gratitude and contentment as well as restoring inner peace and spiritual connection (Revelation 2:4-5).
» Love (1 Corinthians 13:4–8).
As Maya Angelou beautifully said, “People may forget what you say, but they will never forget how you made them feel.” Be loving and kind to every living thing as we are all part of the Universe. Love can only grow love, not the other way around. When we unabashedly show love to others, it inevitably opens doors to bigger and better things.
» Gratitude.
Start your day with gratitude. Be thankful for a new morning and for what you have.
» Be True to Yourself.
Embrace who you are and the body you are in. Don’t let society define you. Believe in yourself. Be Happy.
By JM Perez
