Faith

Blessings Scripture Faith Education Life Lessons

We Cannot Claim Someone Else’s Blessing

JM Perez By JM Perez5 min read1.1K views

“What you do not wholeheartedly claim can never be yours.” — Joan Ambu

The last couple of months have been heartbreaking and nerve wrecking with hateful accusations, disrespect, lingering resentment, revenge, lies, distortion of facts, and back stabbing. The whole ordeal confirmed what I believed all along, reaffirmed my faith, and made it clear that I am still walking on the right path. Someone was wrongfully accused of stealing a blessing intended for someone else to achieve personal success.

The truth is that we cannot steal someone else’s blessing.

Did Jacob steal Esau’s blessing?

As Isaac was old and could no longer see, he called for Esau his older son in private and asked him to prepare a meal for him to eat so that he could give Esau his blessings before dying. Rebekah, who was Isaac’s wife, overheard the private conversation and encouraged her younger son Jacob, to steal his brother’s blessings. When Esau heard of what his brother had done and asked their father for his own blessings, Isaac could not revoke his blessings. Esau’s sin was the fact that he did not value his birthright and sold it to Jacob in return for some stew (Genesis 25:29-34).

The Lord had already chosen Jacob to be the one through whom the twelve tribes of Israel would be born. However, because Jacob wasn’t patient and deceived his father, he too, suffered some consequences such as:
– Being separated from his family by escaping to his uncle Laban in Harran when he learned that Esau was planning to kill him (Genesis 27:41-30:24).  It is unknown if Jacob ever saw his mother again.
– Being deceived by his uncle Laban, who tricked him into marrying his elder daughter Leah (Genesis 29:25).

When Jacob returned from exile a wealthy man, he decided to reconcile with and make restitution to Esau for the loss he suffered from him when he stole his firstborn blessing. (Genesis 32:3-21). This is one of the greatest peacemaking stories in the Bible and in the World.

Jacob stealing his brother Esau’s blessing. (Isaac Blessing Jacob).
Image Source: Los Angeles County Museum of Art . Painting by Nicolas-Guy Brenet.

Why didn’t God return Esau’s blessing? Because the blessing Isaac promised to Esau wasn’t his to have, but Jacob’s. That’s why God allowed Jacob to keep the blessing he received through deceit; however, Jacob suffered consequences of impatience.

Cain killing Abel out of jealousy

The first killing of all time is written in the Bible, the Old Testament. In an act of jealousy, Cain, the firstborn son of Adam and Eve murdered his brother Abel because God accepted Abel’s sacrifice but rejected his (Genesis 4:1–16). This resulted in God exiling Cain.

The Bible doesn’t really explain why Cain killed his brother. We only know that God looked with favor on Abel and his offerings because he gave them in faith, valuing God more than his flock. God rejected Cain’s offerings because he offered some fruits of the ground, not the best he could have offered. Even though God rejected Cain’s offerings, He encouraged him to do better and also warned him about his anger. With options presented to him, Cain decided to murder his brother. So, why did he do it?

Is it possible that with Abel gone, Cain didn’t have to feel inferior or have his offerings compared to those of his brother? Did he want to keep all the blessings for himself?
Even though Cain didn’t express remorse for his actions and was only concerned about his safety, God was merciful toward him and his crime didn’t go unpunished. After putting a mark on Cain so that no one who found him would kill him at sight (Genesis 4:15), he was exiled to Nod, on the land east of Eden, where he started a family and wandered the earth for the rest of his life.

Cain Leadeth Abel to Death.
Image Source: TheJewishMuseum.org Painting by James Tissot.

What can we learn from these stories?

  • There are consequences for sins
  • Recognize that we’ve all sinned and fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23)
  • Understand that greed is a sin and overconfidence does not last forever
  • Have faith in God and practice patience
  • Understand that it is easy to get angry and jealous
  • Become your brother’s and sister’s keepers

As we can see from the stories above, it is impossible to claim someone else’s blessing.  Like the saying goes, “Man proposes, but God disposes” (Proverbs 19:21-23). It doesn’t matter what anyone promises, because God has the final say. Rather than envying someone else, we should work hard at achieving our own goals. If you love what you do, and you are happy doing it, you will never be tempted to envy. No one can make you feel inferior unless you wholeheartedly believe it, and getting your opponent out of the way will not guarantee success. You have to be willing to change your thought process to see positive results; this takes time and effort, so be patient with yourself. Whenever you find yourself submerged in anger, remember that you can overcome it. You have options.

What I have seen is that people sometimes block their blessings and blame others for it.

  • Lack of faith. Claiming to love God, invoking His name in vain while being untruthful.
  • Guilt and projecting that guilt onto someone else. Taking what is wrong about you and blaming someone else for it, is not the solution. Just admit your fault.
  • Unwilling to admit your wrong either due to pride or the fear of being judged by others.
  • Ungratefulness and selfishness. Thinking that everything should be about you, that people ought to play by your rules without you ever acknowledging or thanking them.
  • Being negative, bitter, and unforgiving. Always seeing the worst in others and not willing to let go of past hurts.
  • Instigator. You pretend you are a good person, yet, you are a negative and one sided person, who only focuses on problems and never on solutions. You gossip behind people’s backs and only listen to what benefits you and enjoy seeing  people fight against each other.
  • Scripture set aside, the one sure way to lose your blessing is by disrespecting and abusing your elders. Once you’ve crossed that line and do not repent, you can bid goodbye to your blessing.

In conclusion, you cannot steal or claim someone else’s blessing as yours. It’s just impossible. You can acquire it momentarily; however, you cannot reap the benefits because the blessing was never meant for you in the first place.  Even if you willingly give up your blessing, the receiver cannot reap the rewards unless God says otherwise.

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JM Perez By JM Perez
Faith Inspire Life Lessons People

Forgiveness Unleashes Strength

JM Perez By JM Perez4 min read1.4K views

“Forgiveness is above all a personal choice, a decision of the heart to go against natural instinct to pay back evil with evil.” — Pope John Paul II

As a teenager, I often heard my mother say that some people are born without conscience. I knew she said it to ease some of my pain and to get me started on my healing journey. Life as we know is and will always remain a mystery; what I know for sure however, is that people are born equal and heredity sets us apart. Everyone has a conscience which allows us to act on our choices and decision making. Once in a while, my mom would repeat that statement as we jokingly poked at the past, and somehow it just infuriates me now.

As a child, I was a third-party observer to constant intentional psychological, emotional and physical abuse toward someone very dear to me-from someone I loved and trusted. By the time I became a teenager, I was scarred by those horrendous, repeated acts of violence. I was still a child, weak and helpless, who knew the corrupt system couldn’t help me and worst, would conspire against me. I went from a third-party observer to an actual victim. While living daily through extreme fear and uncertainty, the trauma of my sister’s sudden and unexpected death left me in a dark place. I was alone with an unstable mind, going through a deep depression. I was literally a walking dead …

For months, I was consumed by anger, mainly towards myself for being weak. I sought help and was blessed by the generosity of some and the invaluable advice of others. After witnessing my mother slip into a deep depression herself, as she struggled not only to cope with the death of her child, but also to keep me alive, I made the conscious decision to forgive my offender in order for both my mother and myself to live. What was done was done and I could not change that. The only thing I could do was to let go of the pain and chose to live. I made that choice willingly and reinvented myself. To this day I never received an apology and I do not expect one. I am much happier and more understanding now.

“The act of forgiveness takes place in our own mind. It really has nothing to do with the other person.” — Louise Hay

It’s extremely hard to forgive someone who has deeply hurt us and refuses to make amends, especially when every single cell in your body screams for retribution. It’s a feeling I know too well, since I survived it and came out stronger than ever. What can forgiveness do for you?

  • It frees you
  • It heals you
  • It strengthens you
  • It improves your health
  • It nurtures your mind
  • It cleanses your soul
  • It improves your self-esteem
  • It unleashes your compassionate side
  • It releases you from the past
  • It helps you live the moment
  • It’s a personal gift (blessing) to yourself
Image Source: QuotesCloud.com

Too many of us have been thought that forgiving someone who has hurt us is a sign of weakness, and doing so gives the person more control over us. We have been thought that getting even with the perpetrator is the only way, if not the best way to regain our peace. Though two wrongs have never made a right, sometimes given a person a taste of their own medicine can redirect them to the right direction. This has nothing to do with revenge, but assisting someone in walking in your shoes. It’s about aiding someone to see the World through your lenses. Revenge, as the dictionary defines it, is to exact punishment or expiation for a wrong on behalf of, especially in a resentful or vindictive spirit. Though tempting, we should not contemplate revenge for the following reasons:

  • It doesn’t ease the hurt
  • It doesn’t return things to their original state
  • The satisfaction is temporary
  • It leaves you bitter and empty
  • It’s an endless nightmare
  • In the end, it can be punishable by law

You cannot change the past and you cannot force your offender to restore your peace. You alone have the power to heal your wounds by embracing yourself as you are. It takes time to heal and while going through the process, choose to forgive yourself and choose to love yourself again.

After some time has passed, you will realize that your offender’s apologies wouldn’t have made a difference. They hurt you deeply, perhaps willingly or unwillingly and may have achieved their goal (to destabilize you). However, none of that matters. Yes, the hurt remains. How you respond to injustice done to you will determine the outcome of the well-being (restoring your peace sooner or slowing down your healing process).

“When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.” — Catherine Ponder

Do not make excuses to shield yourself from what happen. Do not attempt to understand why it happened and do not expect an explanation or an apology. Just acknowledge that it happened. Take back control of your life and do not hold unto your past and your pain. You are no longer a victim and you are no longer a slave to those memories. Believe that you will get through it.

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JM Perez By JM Perez