Death

Death Does Not Invalidate Our Sins

JM Perez By JM Perez5 min read460 views

Death does not invalidate sins; rather, it sends us swiftly to our judgement day. ― Joan Ambu

By all means death is such a painful word, without adding the sadness and void the living have to face. After going through the pain of death myself and accepting the fact that death does not discriminate and can knock on anyone’s door at any given time, I changed my ways and my view of life.

Some people think that death will invalidate their sins since the Lord Jesus Christ gave himself for our sins, that He might deliver us from this present evil world, according to the will of God and our Father (Galatians 1:4 – KJV). Some people continue to sin believing that they can get away with it because our Lord Jesus Christ paid the ultimate price for us. That’s far from the truth since we will all be judged by what we did and what we didn’t do. As Christians, true Christians, when it comes to the Word of God, we should believe it in its entirety and not choose what to believe. We can either accept the Word or reject it, but we should not choose.

Image Source: Pinterest.com.

Had death been the end of sin, many who didn’t live a righteous life, would care less about their judgement day, would not be worried, panicking, attempting to right wrongs, and requesting a religious leader (Priest, Pastor, Imam, Cohen, Pujari, Bhikkhu, etc…) for confession and absolution when close to death. I don’t know why some people wait until the end to recognize and call upon the name of the Lord; however, it’s better late than never. This being said, I acknowledge the importance of confession and absolution, especially as it pertains to the young, the old, the sick, as well as for those who for some reason can’t express themselves.

I want to believe that confessing our sins and receiving absolution can wipe away our sins, if we are truly remorseful of our bad deeds and intend to change our ways. What I know for sure, is that God alone can forgive our sins as He looks at our hearts and sees our intentions (Jeremiah 17:10 – ESVUK). Yet, the question remains: does absolution by a religious leader truly forgive all sins (venial and/or mortal)? The living can only hope so, but it’s for the dead to find out. One thing the Bible is clear about is that a person who doesn’t forgive others will not be forgiven by God. And not being forgiving by God means that your sins will be held against you.

As long as we are alive, there is hope for all.

“But I do not want you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning those who have fallen asleep, lest you sorrow as others who have no hope. For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so God will bring with Him those who sleep in Jesus.” – 1 Thessalonians 4:13-14

We are all sinners in need of God’s grace.
A Christian, as defined by Compassion.com, is someone whose behavior and heart reflects Jesus Christ. A non-Christian on the other hand can be defined as a person without beliefs (or a person who hasn’t heard about Jesus Christ). The similarity between the two is that both are sinners. The difference is that a true Christian (believer) will turn to God for help whenever they sin, and try to do better. A non-Christian just does what he or she wants. There are three types of non-Christians:

  • The righteous non-Christians. Although these individuals don’t know the Gospel, they act in accordance with moral laws (Romans 2:14 – KJV). A great example of this can be found in the Parable of the Good Samaritan.
  • The non-believers. People with no religious faith or who don’t believe in anything.
  • The unbelievers. These individuals tend to be ignorant due to lack of understanding of the Christian message. Rather than accepting the Bible/Word of God as truth, they choose what works for them. These are the people who refuse to accept truth even when they see proof.

Just as every single one of us fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23 – NKJV), there is hope for everyone because God’s message of salvation extends to everyone (Romans 10:12 – ESV), and God alone can save us, Christians and non-Christians alike (Ephesians 2:8-9 – ESV). As long as we seek to know God, we can all be saved.

It is important to remember God in good and bad times. God is good all the time, even when we are not. Sometimes we do the most despicable things, yet, God still loves and forgives us. Whenever God shows us mercy, we should be grateful and thankful. We must refrain from doing and saying bad things, and turn from our wicked ways. It is the fate of every living thing to eventually die. For believers death means life (Philippians 1:21 – NKJV). True believers as well as those who live a righteous life are not afraid to transcend when the time comes. Everyday we are alive, it is not because we deserve it. It’s simply by the grace of God and His abundant mercy that we are saved.

“But God, who is rich in mercy, out of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead through our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ — by grace you have been saved.” – Ephesians 2:4-5

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Although we are conceived in sin (Psalm 51:4-6 – ESV), those who were too young to profess their faith as well as those who died in infancy for instance, might be those whose sins get wiped away. Also, God will surely have mercy on those with mental illnesses. Perhaps God may also have mercy on those who never heard of the Gospel, yet lived by the golden rule. More precisely, to love your neighbor as yourself (Mark 12:31 – NIV).

Romans 2:6 tells us that God “will repay each person according to what they have done.”

Stephane Tchoudja Nana {Memory of}

JM Perez By JM Perez2 min read688 views

“When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.” – Henri J.M. Nouwen (The Road to Daybreak: A Spiritual Journey).

I got a painful call a little while ago informing me of the death of my childhood friend; my best male friend. I feel alone. Time seems to have stopped. I am torn apart. I am falling apart …
We found each other not too long ago after seventeen years and now I have lost him for good.

Nothing is worth loosing a good friend and we shouldn’t give up too easily when it comes to saving a relationship because we cannot reset time. We should strive to stand tough with one another, especially when the odds seem to be against us. Life is short. Live and learn. Love and kindness don’t cost a thing. Spread some Love.

May God be with his family and get them through these difficult times.

“He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” ― Revelation 21:4

Grief Journey and Support

JM Perez By JM Perez3 min read953 views

The last couple of weeks have been heartbreaking with news of acquaintances passing away. As we scrolled down their social media profiles, I was saddened by a few insensitive comments left by family members, friends and strangers. Right away I could tell the difference between those who have experienced a loss and those who didn’t have a clue about the pain of death, thus writing insensitive and infuriating comments.

I want to believe that those offering their sympathy and best wishes mean well. Oftentimes those comments are misplaced. A simple I am sorry about your lost is enough to comfort the mourner. May the soul of your loved one rest in peace and I am praying for you are very soothing too. What I found comforting was the company of my friends sitting silently by my side ready to break my fall. There are things you just don’t tell someone going through a loss such as:

  • It was their time. Yes, we do understand that. Just don’t remind us.
  • It’s life, accept it and move on. Seriously? Now you are telling people how to feel?
  • Comparing death to God picking the best flower in a garden. If that is such a wonderful thing, why don’t we pray and ask Him to come pick as many beautiful flowers in our garden?
  • Thinking a deceased is happy to be reunited with their predecessors in death. I do not know of anyone who is consciously looking forward to the after life when they have so much to live for.
  • I will personally not tell someone their loved one is in a better place because I do not know that for sure and I cannot explain why dying is better than being here.
Image Source: Symphony of Love.
Image Source: OM.SymphonyOfLove.net.

We must all face loss at some point in Life. My advice to those who have not gone through the pain of death is to fight the urge to say something because everyone else does. When you finally decide to say something, think hard about it before giving it life (is it kind, comforting, soothing, uplifting, insensitive, hurtful, infuriating?) Choose your words carefully and be mindful that the family is hurting and might be reading your comments.
To those who mourn, I recommend you reach out to someone you trust and get some help. Even though the road to acceptance and letting go seems endless; you will experience peace once again.

“In the absence of uplifting words, Silence is the best choice.” ― Joan Ambu

Respect for the Departed Legacy

I don’t know if it’s neglect from family members or some kind of sick trend to have deceased individuals on social media (still accepting friend requests as well as taking part in various discussions).

  • Honor them by promptly deleting their social media accounts
  • Do not share pictures of their final days (those should be kept private)
  • If you must, express thoughts of love rather than insensitive comments
  • Honor the family request for privacy
  • Respect the families way of expressing grief
  • Assist surviving family members if you can
  • Send Prayers to the bereaved family

Our own fear of dying is turning some of us into individuals who honor the dead far more than the living. Go to funerals or just look around you to witness the hypocrisy. Often times, those who care less about each other when they are alive are the first ones to paint a beautiful picture about their relation to the departed. It is shameful and sickening.
In addition to the hypocrisy, there are countless more reasons why some cultures are against open casket and never display their loved ones bodies at funerals. Sometimes enemies are present at funerals, which is very disrespectful to the departed who can no longer fight for themselves. Be the voice of the silent person.

“Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.” – Benjamin Franklin

Love people while they are still alive because they will appreciate it better than someone in a helpless state. They need it more than the dead.

Choose to Love.

Farewell, Maya Angelou (1928 – 2014)

JM Perez By JM Perez1 min read1K views

“What I would really like said about me is that I dared to love. By love I mean that condition in the human spirit so profound it encourages us to develop courage and build bridges, and then to trust those bridges and cross the bridges in attempts to reach other human beings.” – Maya Angelou

Maya Angelou (1970, San Francisco, California).
Maya Angelou (1970, San Francisco, California).
Photo Credit: © Bettmann/Corbis.

“You are the sum total of everything you’ve ever seen, heard, eaten, smelled, been told, forgot – it’s all there. Everything influences each of us, and because of that I try to make sure that my experiences are positive.” – Maya Angelou

Maya Angelou.
Maya Angelou.

“Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hope.” – Maya Angelou

Maya Angelou (1993).
Maya Angelou (1993).

“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” – Maya Angelou

Maya Angelou.
Maya Angelou.

Rest in Peace, Maya Angelou. You will be dearly missed.

Farewell, Madiba (1918 – 2013)

JM Perez By JM Perez1 min read548 views

“Do not judge me by my successes, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again.” ― Nelson Mandela

Nelson Mandela, 1950's.
Nelson Mandela, 1950’s.
Photo: Eyedea Presse.

“I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.” ― Nelson Mandela

Nelson Mandela, 1960's.
Nelson Mandela, 1960’s.

“No one is born hating another person because of the color of his skin, or his background, or his religion. People must learn to hate, and if they can learn to hate, they can be taught to love, for love comes more naturally to the human heart than its opposite.”
― Nelson Mandela, Long Walk to Freedom.

Nelson Mandela, working as a prisoner on Robben Island, 1977.     Photo Credit: Nelson Mandela Centre of Memory.
Nelson Mandela, working as a prisoner on Robben Island, 1977.
Photo Credit: Nelson Mandela Centre of Memory.

“You will achieve more in this world through acts of mercy than you will through acts of retribution.”
― Nelson Mandela

Nelson Mandela.
Nelson Mandela.

“We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, handsome, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?” ― Nelson Mandela

Nelson Mandela.
Nelson Mandela.

Rest in Peace, Nelson Mandela.
You were a Good Man, an Inspiration, a great example of Love and you made a difference in the World.